A mother, probably more than anyone, is either thinking or proclaiming how proud she is of her children. ALL of the time!
She is proud of her kids’ first step, kindergarten graduation, getting a master’s degree, the promotion at work, or becoming a parent. The list never ends. But when expressing pride for a mother’s accomplishments, moms need to fend for themselves.
Try Googling “proud mom,” and you’ll find that a proud mom is synonymous with her relationship with her children. But moms can be proud of an achievement NOT regarding their kids or even their job.
It could be a mundane, ordinary task requiring much effort and focus. A mom’s mind is so full of scattered thoughts and a fear of disappointing or not being there for her kids. It’s so damn tiresome!
The pandemic did validate my stalling for a few years. Still, when I finally mustered up the courage to make routine and necessary health screening appointments, I realized how overdue I was (over a decade!). I was stunned when my mammography tech was the same one I had ten years ago! It was all there, in my file, no guessing or denying.
She scolded me appropriately, and it wasn’t much appreciated. Did she have any idea what it took for me to get there? It was a slightly awkward moment, but it passed because after many years of mothering, these little “digs” don’t deserve more than a nanosecond of your attention.
Of course, the anxiety and the fear of the unknown were overwhelming, and I imagine it was magnified because it had been so long since the last time I sat there clutching a plastic bag with my personal belongings, waiting to be called in. But I got through it, and despite a minor concern, it all checked out fine in the end, as my gyno appointment had too.
The next stop was going for my colonoscopy and endoscopy. I didn’t cancel the appointment with my gastroenterologist this time, but after enduring that wretched prep, I remembered why I also put this off for so long. And again, I persevered and got through it, and no new abnormalities were found, thank goodness. I just got to keep my good old acid reflux and ignore the medical advice to avoid certain foods because how could I give up my afternoon espresso? It gets me through the dinner and evening madness.
Now, I understand and can never belittle the gratification and relief I felt that I checked out ok, for now, because nothing is guaranteed at any age. And naturally, the old saying, a mom needs to take care of herself first to care for her loved ones, is always at the forefront, regardless of her kids’ ages. A relatively healthy mom keeps everything moving and satisfies countless needs of her spouse, children, grandchildren, and even parents.
But, in all honesty, in the end, I was so proud of myself for pulling through, for making AND keeping all my appointments, without creating a hiccup in anyone’s daily schedule or interrupting the usual flow of my presence in the lives of my family. (I even made dinner the night before my colonoscopy with half a bottle of Miralax still to go.) Wow, I didn’t miss a beat!
So, this Mother’s Day, all moms deserve an “I’m so proud of you” speech for a deed that goes unnoticed. That’s the best gift. Just be super proud of yourself, and the gratitude and recognition of your loved ones will follow, not only on your special day but all year round.
