It feels like our children suddenly grew,
I think it’s because of our new Cavapoo.
We’d been wanting a pet but felt nervous.
“You’ve got kids,” they said. “You can do this.”
Now we’re back to baby blankets, feeding schedules, that certain smell,
Back to wondering if we’re doing anything well.
Before, eight years ago, when I became a mother,
I didn’t comprehend the mental load of caring for another.
Now I’m back to researching: What’s the best…?
Back to feeling happily consumed and obviously obsessed.
Back to hosting a stream of visitors at our home,
Back to never being totally alone.
The newborn phase it is just that,
Temporary: it can all change at the drop of a hat.
The puppy fits as if she has always been here,
She completes our family; that much is clear.
What was it like before? We can barely remember those days,
It’s been a fun, love-filled, totally exhausting haze.
The kids take care of her, looking so tall,
When did that happen? They were just so small.
Their feet no longer babies’, their ideas their own,
I wonder what they’ll remember when they’re fully grown.
I want to appreciate these moments, soak them in deeply,
I want to be present and attentive, even if I’m sleepy.
Every day that passes, it gets better, it’s true.
But I do think of those babies and think, I miss you.
While the kids fall asleep, I still stay in their beds,
And now the dog likes to cuddle by their heads.
I don’t want to rush; it goes by in a blink.
A new baby – even an animal – really makes you think.
I’m so lucky to be living this beautiful life,
To add “dog mom” to my roles of social worker, mother, and wife.
I love this new chapter of us, this new version of now,
I never want to forget looking at my family and thinking, Wow!
The house may be messy, but we’re truly living,
I’ll always be grateful for the love our pet is giving.
