I’d like to write a piece bursting with never-before-heard life hacks for balancing your job, your spouse, your kids, and all of the million and one things that go along with them. I am a person who plans and makes to-do lists and is typically pretty organized. I put my winter clothes into storage during the summer and vice-versa. I rarely have to run to the store for a cooking or baking ingredient because I’ve realized we’re out in the middle of preparation. I occasionally do laundry ASAP because my kids run out of clean undies.
I don’t like being caught off-guard or ill-prepared. I’m not perfect, but I think I’m pretty good at this job. But right now, I do not have my stuff together.
Right now, my sink is full of dishes. Even though our anniversary was last week, I haven’t gotten an anniversary gift for my husband. And there are numerous emails in my work inbox that I haven’t responded to.
We’ve been dealing with a lot around here, including a job change for my husband and the death of a family member who was a big and beloved presence in our lives. I’m trying to help my husband turn our finished basement into an office and prepare him to be away for a week for training. We have doctor’s appointments four out of five days this week due to our imminent change in insurance. My mother’s health is in severe decline, and she lives almost four hours away. A lot is going on. Oh, and the baby doesn’t sleep so well, either.
Lately, life is swirling around me in some crazy, colossal vortex. I don’t want to get sucked down into it, so I have to take it one day at a time.
Right now, I can’t plan too far ahead. I’m a little overwhelmed and a lot tired. I can’t worry about where we will stay for a friend’s upcoming wedding—we can figure that out later. Today, it’s enough that the baby is fed, clean, and happy, that our kindergartner has everything needed for school in her backpack, that there’s food in the fridge, and that we are chipping away at the office project. Tomorrow, I will worry about the next few items on my list.
Life does get really hectic sometimes, especially for mothers. We are often expected to take care of more than should be reasonably expected, and sometimes, we will get overwhelmed. The work is rewarding, but the days can be really long.
We should allow ourselves to say, “Today, I will pay all of the bills, but I’m NOT going to grocery shop.” Or “Today, I am NOT going to wash any clothes, but I will put away the clean laundry that’s been sitting in the family room for three days.” Today, I did laundry, vacuumed, and took my daughter to the dentist, but we had leftovers for dinner. And that’s ok. I did what I could handle.
Most days, I try to do it all, and I have an extra cup of coffee at two p.m. so I can fit it all in, but not today. Today, I’m taking bite-sized chunks that I’ll be able to swallow. Today is not going to be Instagram or Pinterest-worthy at my house, and that’s fine. I’ll hope for a good night’s sleep tonight, and tomorrow, I can go back to trying to be the best stay-at-home mom.
