Let’s face it: we were all optimistic before we had kids. We all said, “My future child is not going to live on chicken nuggets and pizza,” or “We are all going to eat dinner together every night, and they’re going to eat the healthy and nutritious meals I serve them.”
Fast-forward, and you have selective eaters. Your kids are eating pizza in the car between school and baseball practice, and you haven’t eaten sitting down in over a week. Your kid IS eating chicken nuggets more than 50% of the time. They’re down to one preferred vegetable, and you make three different dinners every night: one for your first kid, one for your second, one for your partner, and you eat what’s left while cleaning up.
First of all, it’s not just you, and it’s not anything you did! I felt about 1000x better after discussing kids, nutrition, and selective eaters with fellow Westchester County Mom contributor Anita Mirchandani, Registered Dietician, fitness professional, and a mother of two boys.
She said, “As a dietitian and a mother, I’ve seen it all when it comes to selective eating patterns. For kids between the ages of one and ten, calorie intake is the most important. So, if your child keeps their patterns but gets the recommended daily calorie requirement, it is okay. It is okay if they want the same breakfast, lunch, and dinner every night. If they eat fruit after their dinner or if they want crackers with their breakfast, it’s okay.”
Nevertheless, we still want our kids to eat more proteins, fruits, vegetables, and whole grains to support good nutrition, healthy immune systems, and growing bodies. I have tried every strategy to get my kids to try different foods, including having professional “Food Bridges” made for my son, who has texture aversions and just general anxiety related to trying new things.
Anita and I have summarized all the tips, tricks, and games for selective eaters.
1. Food Bridges
A “food bridge” is when you identify all the foods your child eats willingly and then the “goal foods” that will eventually make their way into your child’s diet. You work to find a way to bridge the comfort foods to the goal foods by utilizing familiar characteristics in foods your child does like (color, texture, temperature, etc.). For example, my child ate Cheerios, but I wanted him to eat yogurt. The food bridge for that is to start with Cheerios, then try Cheerios in milk, then change to Cheerios in plain yogurt, ending up with him eating just plain yogurt.
There are bridges for every child: the texture-sensitive, the one-color wonders, and the kid wanting chicken nuggets at every meal. After seeing some of these food bridges and getting the idea, you can make your own, and the possibilities are endless!
2. Kiss, Lick, Taste
I followed many Instagram moms and found this ridiculously easy strategy worked! I put three foods out for my child: one favorite, one he was “okay with” but didn’t love, and one new food. I asked him to pick up one of his preferred bites with me and “kiss” the bite-sized piece, then “lick” the piece, then taste it. We would then do this with food #2 and, eventually, food #3.
It’s silly and fun to make big kissing noises, funny licking faces, and exaggerated “yum” noises for both parent and child! It keeps the mood light instead of the stress of trying to convince them to try it, which promotes bonding over dinner time rather than fighting. Even if your child picks it up, kisses it, and stops, this paves the way for familiarity with the food, and maybe when they see it again later on, the new food won’t seem so scary.
3. Keep it Around
New foods are not appealing to kids just because they are unfamiliar with them. Even if your child shows no interest the first 20 times it’s on the table, they may be curious when it gets to the table the 21st time. We know it’s frustrating because this can feel like a waste of money and time preparing a new food multiple times with no success, but keep up the no pressure and the” it’s there if you want it” attitude. They may eventually ask you for a bite if they see you eating it!
4. Use the Movies
How did my son come to love bananas? Minions! He saw how much the minions loved bananas when he was around four and wanted to imitate the little yellow guys and eat them, too! You will never believe this, but it also worked after we watched Popeye with spinach (raw, not canned, because I have never tried canned spinach!) Start using those TV shows and movies to your advantage by introducing foods their favorite characters eat.
5. Superpowers
We started a silly game at the dinner table that my kids love. This bite will give you a superpower that makes your parents do anything! A bite of carrot made Dad dance uncontrollably, and a raspberry took away Mom’s voice for five minutes (I think my husband even tried a bite for this one). This encourages family fun over the dinner table and keeps the attention on a positive outcome for trying a new food.
6. Don’t Freeze Me
We try this when eating something we like, such as a sandwich or a wrap. We go to take a bite, and halfway up, the kids yell, “Freeze!” and come and steal a bite of the food and run away and go, “Unfreeze!” The adult then acts surprised, “Who ate my food?! This is crazy!” Your kids will get a kick out of being cheeky while trying something new.
7. Alexa!
Now that my son is seven years old and old enough to understand nutrition, it’s paved the way for him to make decisions about the food he eats. He likes numbers, so reading the food labels and the percentages of daily servings helps sometimes. At other times, we shout to Alexa from the dinner table, “Alexa, how much protein is in an egg?” Utilizing instant information from a source other than Mom and Dad helps!
8. Never Give Up
No matter what, remember that you are doing a good job, and patience is sometimes the key here. Anita states, “We all grow up and learn to make informed food decisions, and many patterns will eventually dissolve with mental growth and maturity.” No child eats everything, just like no adult eats everything.
So what if your kid is eating chicken nuggets most nights right now? They have protein and calories! Pizza has cheese and tomatoes, right? As moms, our goal is to do the best we can for our kids in every way, but we should remember that perfect moms don’t exist, just like perfect eaters don’t exist. Keep trying new foods, keep it light, and keep laughing during meal times! Remember, they are alive and well because of you…and chicken nuggets.
