The game of tug-of-war was always my favorite in gym class when I was in elementary school. I loved the rush pulsing through my veins when my team was pulling their hardest to get the other team dragged through the dirt. But then, I was being pulled and yanked across the lawn, only to land on my friend’s hand, as we fell to the ground defeated.
So often, I think motherhood and tug-of-war go hand in hand.
Life lessons were learned while on the grassy lawn covered in dewdrops. Those lessons would not surface until I became a mom, long after the push-and-pull of the childhood game. The constant ebb and flow of life, unexpected twists and turns, ups and downs, the excitement of what is to come next, and the unknown always keep me on my toes, as it did in the yard of the playground.
Should the kids wake up at their leisure or follow some sort of schedule? Do I limit phone use or allow it to become their sixth appendage? The mess of their rooms, leave it to the mice that may appear, claiming salt & vinegar potato chips, or help keep it neat and organized?
Moms are always simply trying to find a balance. What I have realized, all of those nights wide awake at 3 a.m., is that all I can do is try my best. It sounds silly, simple, and maybe a bit juvenile, but for me, that’s it in a nutshell.
My best is enough, and I need to be confident that even though there is a push and pull at the present moment, a balance will once again emerge.
Maybe I need to go back to my nine-year-old self, on the playground in Florida, and feel the confidence I radiated while walking towards the thick white piece of rope that lay on the ground for a game of tug-of-war. When I picked up that wide rope, I gave it my all. I wasn’t going to give anything less than my best, not to disappoint my classmates or myself.
But guess what? Even when the balance was lost, I dropped the rope, dusted off the dry dirt, and moved on, ready to find joy in other parts of the day.
And that is how I am going to approach each day, doing my best to find a balance. I am not going to give anything less than my best. When I fail, and there are a lot of those moments, I am going to dust myself off, move on, and exude confidence in the next task at hand without looking back.
