By definition, empathy means the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Some people are naturally empathetic, while others take a bit more time to feel the emotions of others, especially those with whom they disagree.
So, how do we teach our children about empathy? Should we push this, or should it come naturally? How do we teach children to listen to others and understand their feelings, while also understanding their own?
As a parent, I believe that modeling good behavior is key. Our children watch us, learn from us, and we are their most influential teachers. We need to show kindness towards others, teach them to respect all individuals, and encourage them to understand that while not all people react the same way, we should try to hear everyone out and be empathetic towards their feelings, whether they are big or small.
I am not perfect, and neither are my children. I will always correct my children when they are wrong. I will never make excuses for them. I will not enable them and try to cover up their mistakes. I will always teach them kindness and love.
Recently, I ran into a situation where a child was outright cruel to one of my kids. As I looked at this child, I saw it right then and there. As my little one was upset, he just seemed unfazed by his tears. It alarmed me.
If my children ever see another child upset, they make sure they wrap their arms around that friend and ask if they are okay. Even their teachers have told me that they are always so moved by their kindness and empathy. It always makes me feel like I am doing something right.
Now, don’t get me wrong, my kids are sweet, but they are also very whiny, messy, and not always great at sharing with their siblings. There is also room for improvement, but at least they have good hearts, and to me, that is the most important quality to have.
Teach your child to be the person who helps someone up when they fall. To be the person who stands up for what is right. To be the sun in someone’s storm. Teach them to value others’ feelings and to try to understand them. Teach them to listen.
Teaching and showing them empathy at a young age will be a valuable tool as they get older. I am still learning and continually striving to improve. And that is also something I am happy my children are getting to see.
