Being a parent can seem like a constant flux of emotions. This roller coaster ride can be challenging to navigate at times while being a rewarding journey.
It is advantageous for parents to explore and revisit various themes and lessons of life during their teen’s stages of development. As a therapist, I have found the following five talking points have been threads through one’s life that keep reoccurring. Keeping an open discussion can enable a parent to initiate preventative measures and strategies for teens to utilize throughout life.
1. Social Media
Social media plays an influential role in a teenager’s life. Its impact can positively and negatively affect a teenager’s perception of self and identity. As a clinician, I recommend that parents monitor and observe their teen’s use of social media. Identifying potential risks and facilitating open discussions with your teen can assist in developing preventative online safety tools and teach teens about responsible social media use.
While analyzing social media and its impact on your teen’s daily lives, exploring the frequency, intensity, and effects on cognitive functions is important. Parents and teens can incorporate a monthly discussion to evaluate the positive and negative impacts of social media use. Observing sleep patterns, concentration levels, mood, and overall quality of life can be very telling.
Social media should not be used as a replacement for in-person interactions. Social media can reinforce a teenager’s connection with friends and families that they don’t have daily access to, but it is also essential to develop interpersonal skills to foster balance.
Social media goes hand-in-hand with social circles and boundaries. Teens can use social media as examples of healthy and unhealthy communication skills. In addition, educating teens on cyberbullying, online harassment, and exposure to harmful content will begin to prepare them for the dangers in cyberspace.
Each day for two weeks, list five examples of contact or content you were exposed to, influenced by, or interacted with, and list five face-to-face interactions you were exposed to and participated in. After the completion of online and in-person lists, compare and explore the following:
- Frequency
- Duration
- Intensity
- Impact on mood
- Identify positive and negative outcomes.
2. Social Circles & Peer Interaction
Social circles and peer interactions as a teen are complex and ever-changing phenomena. Many teens use social media to meet and connect, while others use in-person forums. Peer groups have a direct influence on a teenager’s self-esteem, identity, and, at times, mental health. As a parent, it is advised that you monitor your teen’s online activity with peers while also encouraging face-to-face meetups. Social circles play a crucial role in a teenager’s social skills and identity development.
Ask questions:
- How does your teen describe their social circle?
- How do you describe your teen’s social circle? Would you identify it as a close friend group? A large random group of friends with similar interests? Or a group that feels like they are outcasts?
- What are your peers identified shared core beliefs, morals, and themes?
- Identify positive and negative results.
- Does your peer group have a leader? If so, who is it? Describe them.
3. Boundaries
Boundaries at any age can be challenging to develop, set, and maintain. During the teen years, negotiating boundaries and fostering one’s own autonomy is a tedious task to master. As parents, establishing limits and fostering independence becomes a delicate balance. Through healthy boundary setting, we role model for our teens how to prepare for the responsibilities of adulthood.
Observing your teen experiment with negotiating their own boundaries and respecting rules can become a heartbreaking task. However, the goal is to have our teens believe in their self-efficacy and learn to understand the importance of safety and respect for boundaries.
Remember that realistic boundary setting is not perfection. When working with your teen, introduce open-ended questions that will promote discussions and identify what your teen needs from you. In this bond-creation process, your teen will be encouraged to use you as a platform for their growth.
4. Substance Use
Social media, social circles, and boundaries all have an impact on a teenager’s experimentation with drugs and alcohol. Educating our teens on the dangers of substance abuse starts with teaching them preventative measures. In this day and age, drug and alcohol use has become a serious epidemic. Access and availability are at our teen’s fingertips. Exploring with our teens the risk of addiction and overdose is an essential weapon for this battle against drugs and alcohol.
Creating that nesting place for yourself and your teens to explore and discuss the prevalence of substance use is an important stepping stone. These discussions can be challenging to have, but they are necessary. The ultimate goal is that we, as parents, can be their first point of reference and contact.
Through public awareness, safeguarding medications, and school-based initiatives, we as a community can equip our children to become healthy adolescents and adults.
5. Finances
The world of finance isn’t only for adults. Teenagers should start learning about personal finances and how to make intelligent decisions regarding money. Beginning at a young age, it is advised to start teaching your children the key concepts of navigating the financial world.
Here are some key concepts for your teen to explore:
- Income
- How to save money
- Resources
- Creating a budget
- Tracking expenses
- Learning the pros and cons of debit cards and credit cards
- Setting up a savings account and checking account
- Exploring short-term and long-term financial goals
- Seeking advice from financial advisors
- Learning about IRAs, CDs, and bonds
This list can sometimes seem intimidating; however, your teen needs to stay informed about their finances while considering income and expenses. The world of finance can be intriguing, and if you allocate your resources wisely, your returns can lead to a prosperous future.
