Valentine’s Day may have come and gone, but I can’t let it go. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I might be a Valentine’s Day Grinch. I enjoy celebrating with my husband, making Valentine’s crafts with my kids, and giving them little gifts and cards.
But when it comes to the ubiquitous card exchanges at school? Hot take: I hate them.
I hate my kids coming home with a bunch of paper that inevitably makes a mess. They barely look at the cards, caring far more about whatever trinkets they received. The cards get left everywhere and usually wind up on the floor, where the dogs and cats get ahold of them.
Then my kids cry about that card from their best friend I’ve never heard of. I hate that my kids care more about the toys they get than that a friend took the time to give them a card. I hate writing out cards to children I don’t know for my preschooler out of obligation, her having no idea what is going on, nor caring.
I hate fighting with my elementary school-age child to write Valentines to classmates he has never spoken to and having me care more than he does about the entire thing. Most of all, I hate how card exchanges have become a contest to have the coolest handout in the class, another opportunity for a popularity contest in an area already full of them.
I get that a lot of this is developmentally appropriate. But it all feels like such a waste when the underlying point is to show people you care, and that point is seemingly lost.
Maybe it would be different if my kids were older and more independent and made a card for each person or did a Secret Santa-style exchange where they had to put real thought into what to get one specific person. Or if my older child was enthusiastic about preparing the cards or if he found handwriting easy.
Or maybe I’m just a miserable person looking for a reason to complain. Perhaps I want to take something that causes a lot of chaos in my home off my plate.
Then again, I don’t have another solution. So, let another year of card exchanges commence, I guess. At least the kids enjoy it, so I’ll happily play along and continue making the experience as special as I can for them. Because truthfully, whatever my opinion, the kids having fun matters most to me.
