Dear Senior,
It’s hard to let you go a little more each day, but be patient with me as I go through this process. I’m trying.
It’s hard watching you continue to grow, knowing you will be on your own. I’m trying.
It’s hard to relive memories and often want to put it all on pause. I’m trying.
It’s hard knowing I have made so many mistakes and wish I could go back in time and redo it all. I’m trying.
It’s hard to believe my once-missing-front-tooth child with dirty knees is now ready to put on a cap and gown and fly. I’m trying.
It’s hard to gaze at you, feeling flooded with hundreds of emotions, and trying to keep it all together. I’m trying, so please be patient with me.
But you know what isn’t hard?
It’s not hard watching you overcome challenges, persevere, and find your path.
It’s not hard to embrace every moment you feel joy and allow it to seep inside of me, too.
It’s not hard to listen to your laugh, the same laugh you had as a toddler.
It’s not hard to know. Even though miles will soon separate us, you are ready to be on your own. You are independent with a strong head on your shoulders.
It’s not hard to relish in your accomplishments, for each one is well deserved.
It’s not hard to embrace you and feel all of our hugs since the beginning of time.
It’s not hard to gaze at you with wonder as tears form and a smile parts my lips, for I know your future is nothing but bright.
It’s not hard to watch you love.
It’s not hard to watch you live.
It’s not hard to watch you grow into your authentic self.
It’s not hard to watch you share your gifts with the world.
So, as I stand by watching you, please be patient. Because even though I am watching a miraculous blessing grow in front of my eyes, it’s hard some days. But please know I’m trying.
I’m trying to let go bit by bit to fully allow your wings to open and soar to depths you only know slowly.
So as you continue to fly along your journey, know in your heart, I am trying, and this mama will continue to send you silent prayers of comfort, love, and all you have ever dreamed of for your beautiful, magical life.
